A little over 4 weeks ago, I heard about a workout program called the Summer Shred through an online community I am a part of called E3. Having been working out consistently 3 days a week since around November, with no results, I knew I needed to try something different. The program was something like $12, so I bought it, not really knowing what I was in for. After finding out what I had in fact paid for, I got really nervous. The program involved a lot of lifting actual barbells and way too much rowing for my liking. Beyond the barbells, it also called for pull ups once a week. I can't do a pull up! Thankfully, I convinced a friend/co-worker to do it with me. This helped me get over the fear and try it anyway.

As part of the program, we were strongly encouraged to take before pictures and take measurements. I didn't want to do either. What happens if in 4 weeks nothing changed? My thought process; that could happen, which means I would have failed, which means I probably just shouldn't try. Terrible, I know, but this is somewhat normal for those of us who identify as Enneagram 1's. We are labeled the perfectionist or sometimes the reformer. If it's not right, we want it fixed. If it's not perfect, what's the point. I have struggled with maintaining a healthy lifestyle all of my adult life. I have tried so many different things but never something that would be a quick fix. What inevitably happens is one of 2 things: 
1. I work really hard, see results, think I probably can't do any better so I stop
2. I work really hard, see no results, quit because what's the point

No more! Even saying that is pretty risky because the reality is, I will probably screw up again. And that's ok. Here is what I am learning in all of this:

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

The funniest thing is that I am usually pretty quick to celebrate progress in those around me even though it has not achieved perfection. But in myself, progress is weak, perfection is necessary. It makes no sense, therefore I am leaving that behind and practicing celebrating myself just as I would celebrate with one of my friends.

I recently listened to a podcast from Annie F. Downs where she interviewed two people who identify as Enneagram 1's and that is when I realized this idea of progress not perfection. No coincidence that it was the night before I had to take my after picture and take my after measurements. I wasn't even sure I would do it.

But I did. And while I still don't love the picture, progress was most definitely made! Every number went down and the evidence was clear in the pictures. I wish I could say I jumped up and down with excitement, but I didn't. I still didn't feel like I could celebrate. The picture was still bad. Something I wasn't proud to show anybody.

But as time went on, I remembered what I had heard in the podcast. It's about PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION. 

I wish I could say fitness is the only place I struggle with believing that motto. It is not much different from my spiritual journey.

Sanctification is a fancy word for the journey God takes us on when we trust Him with our lives (justification). This journey is meant to make us more like Jesus prior to being glorified and reunited with Him. And we will not reach the end of sanctification on this side of Heaven. So if I live to the average life expectancy of 78.69 years, it will be a long while before perfection. And if that is true, living disappointed in the lack of perfection instead of celebrating progress would lead to a pretty depressing life. And I ain't about that! So whatever it takes, I'm doing it. This may include vulnerability with my community. It may mean memorizing new scripture. It may mean saying no to things that pull me away from fellowship with Jesus. For you, it could be something different. Are you willing to do what it takes? I think you are. I know He will.

So what now?

First, summer shred doesn't stop. I have committed to celebrating progress and continuing on. It will continue to be difficult to fight against the fear of failure, but that is just what I will do. Fight.

Secondly, I will continue to fight for my faith.

My journey with Christ is very much like my fitness journey. It's a long road which will include many unexpected turns and detours. I may even get turned around at times, losing ground along the way. Yet God, in His great mercy, will never lose sight of me or fail to walk with me. Even better than that, He is glorified in my weakness.

"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me." 2 Corinthians 12:9

I loved what one of the interviewees said in the podcast:
"My pursuit is not perfection, it's Jesus. And when I pursue Jesus, progress happens."

This is what I want my life to be about. So if you are anything like me, remember that while you are advocating for others, Christ has already advocated for you. It is finished. You just need to keep on walking.

And while you walk, you will keep on growing.
Much love friends.
​

Today is Teacher Appreciation Day.

I have no doubt it is not an accident that it is in May. We have been giving our all since August and everyone knows summer is coming without having to look at a calendar. Because if it doesn't come, we may not make it. I used to get very upset when people would tell me I'm so lucky to have an entire summer off. Do they really have no clue what it is like? No Regan, they don't. And that's ok. Teaching is hard, and after 9 years of teaching I assumed it would be easy by now. It hasn't gotten easier, but it has gotten better.

My first year teaching, I had to quickly grab the teacher next door so that I could go cry in the teachers lounge during class. I have grown, that hasn't happened since! My third year teaching I developed eczema while stressing over state testing. My fifth year teaching was by far the hardest year I have had so far (multiple factors involved, see also My Story). My seventh year teaching left me frustrated. My eighth year teaching I had to work around the many Harvey stories with my students. Here I am in my ninth year wondering why it can't be easier.

But then I remember that God has called me to this. I remember that He has equipped me for this. I remember the letters students have written me. I remember that I have an opportunity unlike most. I get to speak life into teenagers on a regular basis and show them what it means to struggle, fail, and eventually succeed. I get to show them what success looks like. Not success for their friend, or the "other kid" who just always gets it, but success for them. I have the joy of reminding my students that their identity in Christ is the only thing that is eternal. This my friends, is not easy. But these kids are worth it. With the many messages they encounter every day, it is important that there are adults in their lives speaking truth and life into them, face to face. The hardest part, we often don't see the moment the kid gets it. We are so deep in it that it's hard to step back, look at the bigger picture, and know that what we are doing is making a difference. That's what I want Teacher Appreciation Day (or week :)) to be about. I want to believe that what I'm doing matters. I want to see a small piece of fruit if God would be so willing to show me. And if I don't, I will still press on. And yes, a free coffee or Route 44 from Sonic might help me! 

Shoutout to the many people that have helped me get where I am today in my career. Just as it takes a village to raise a child, it most definitely takes a village to keep a teacher. There have been too many to name here but I remember you and, thank you. 

My encouragement to you on this Teacher's Appreciation Day is to speak life into a student in your life this week as well as a teacher friend.

This will help us all keep growing.

Technology is great, but writing it down also helps me process all that happened in a day while traveling and gives me a reason to slow down. When I travel, I prefer to spend a full day but also find time to rest at some point. I am an introvert so when I am traveling with people, writing my story is usually my excuse to get away for a moment by myself. 

Tip #2
Use multiple modes of transportation.
I have traveled by bus, train, plane and car. I still have boat to cross off the list. Some day. If you have never been on an Amtrak train in the United States, I would strongly encourage you to do it. There are certain places where it is a lot more accessible (Texas is definitely not one of them, but it's possible) but regardless of where you are, you can make it happen. The stories I have from my train ride from Houston to Washington D.C. are some of the best. You don't have to start out so dramatic, but do it. I'm always on a budget so hopping on a bus is a great way to save money. When traveling with friends renting a car is a great option. The freedom and flexibility it provides is great but when on a budget this may not be ideal.

Tip #3
Save your money. 
You are single. You are only responsible for yourself. Save your money so you can do the things and see the world. I would never recommend going into debt in order to travel. Make a plan and stick to it. 

Tip #4
Make friends wherever you go.
I have so many pictures with people that for the most part are strangers, except they weren't during the time I spent traveling. While on the bike tour in Paris I met a girl who was also exploring the city on her own though she was there for a wedding. We became friends during the tour and I no longer felt alone. While on the train to D.C. I met a couple of guys from Australia. We hung out in the sightseeing car and played cards to pass the time. While in San Francisco, I stayed at a hostel (another story for another day) and met quite a few friends that went with me to rent bikes and ride to Sausalito. I have traveled many places alone but hardly ever feel alone.

Tip #5
Take all the pictures.
For some this is obvious. For others, you go an entire day and have no picture to prove it. Take the selfie if you are by yourself. Ask a stranger to take your picture. Do something just for the picture. You will be thankful later.

I'm going to leave you with those for now and may come back later with some additions. For now, I just want you to know that it is not necessary for you to wait on a husband for a reason to travel. If you have any interest in traveling (and I hope you do), make a list of places you want to go and then just start planning a trip! So maybe you have to stay at a hostel because it's the only housing you can afford. So what! Find a place with great public transportation. It minimizes cost. Think about who you might know that lives somewhere else. Maybe you can stay with them. I will tell you, I have stayed with friends of friends and don't regret it. Lastly, don't feel like you need a reason to travel. We travel just for the sake of traveling. Each place you visit is unique and will be able to teach you something new. 

Be brave sister. And please if you decide to plan a trip, tell me about it!! Be warned, if you're planning it in the summer you might find me tagging along!

Dream big, and never stop growing.
​Love, Regan
​ 

I took down my Christmas decorations and tree today, and it got me thinking about where most of our life is spent. The hype for Christmas is real and long. If you read my last post, you know I had a hard time getting into the hype, but most of the country did not. And then, just like that, Christmas is over and we are preparing to ring in a new year. So as much as we look forward to different seasons, we are quickly reminded it's not where we spend most of our lives.

Our lives are lived in the plains and not the hills and valleys. As a Texan, I can tell you that the plains can be pretty boring. We go to the valley to retreat or rest. We go to the hill or mountain top to celebrate and rejoice. But these are not the places we spend most of our lives. Most of our lives are spent on a journey through the plains. A walk on flatland with not much around to look at.

But I think this is where faithfulness grows. In the plains is where trusting God is imperative. We will never reach the hill or the valley without walking through the plains. We encounter people on this journey through the plains, and God has purpose in that. We go through routines in the plains. These routines that seem meaningless and/or mundane, yes even these have a purpose, if only we will ask God what it is. In the plains is where we rejoice in hope.

I hate leftovers.

I didn't like them growing up and many times, that was the answer to the question, "What's for dinner?" I didn't like them for a few reasons. The first, which is the obvious, it just doesn't taste as good reheated in a microwave! The second being slightly more "diva" of me in that I want to eat a meal that makes sense together and leftovers often meant combining three different meals into one. Just not something I got really excited about. There is also the infamous sniff test to be sure the said leftovers, won't kill you. The best is when your negative sniff test is overruled by a parent who assures you it will be fine. There were certain meals I would be glad to eat leftover like sloppy joe's, Italian sausage or maybe some Hamburger Helper. However, those were the exception, not the rule. And let's be honest, there weren't often leftovers of those!

As an adult I dislike leftovers even more, but in some ways for different reasons. I am single, and leftovers can be an unfriendly reminder of that. I eat the same meal four times instead of two because there is no one to eat with me. I have learned how to make one protein into a variety of meals as well as how to cook for one, all to avoid the dreaded leftover situation. I am not asking for pity, just telling it like it is. 

As I was thinking of my dislike of leftovers, I began to think about how I rely on leftovers in my spiritual life. How silly is that? I go to church on Sunday, receive a word and hope it lasts until the middle of the week. I do a bible study on Wednesday and do enough so I can be full to the next Sunday. In case you were wondering, God never intended that we rely or survive on leftovers.

When the Israelites were in the wilderness after leaving Egypt, God provided exactly what they needed for each day. In fact, He told the Israelites they were to only take what would be necessary for the day. If they took more, it would spoil. God provided manna and quail for the Israelites in the wilderness as a response to their grumblings.

​Exodus 16:13-21
"In the evening quail came up and covered the camp, and in the morning dew lay around the camp. And when the dew had gone up, there was on the face of the wilderness a fine, flake-like thing, fine as frost on the ground. When the people of Israel saw it, they said to one another, 'What is it?' for they did not know what it was. And Moses said to them, 'It is the bread that the Lord has given you to eat. This is what the Lord has commanded: Gather of it, each one of you, as much as he can eat. You shall each take an omer, according to the number of the persons that each of you has in his tent.' 
And the people of Israel did so. They gathered, some more, some less. But when they measured it with an omer, whoever gathered much had nothing left over, and whoever gathered little, had no lack. Each of them gathered as much as he could eat. And Moses said to them, 'Let no one leave any of it over till the morning.' But they did not listen to Moses. Some left part of it till the morning, and it bred worms and stank. And Moses was angry with them. Morning by morning they gathered it, each as much as he could eat; but when the sun grew hot, it melted."


It was a way for God to remind His people that He is still God, and He has not forsaken them. He was with them in Egypt, and He went with them to the wilderness. Interesting that God gave them the same thing every day, manna and quail, on endless repeat. That may sound like leftovers, but it's not. It's just the same great meal over and over again. Kinda like the sloppy joe's, Italian sausage or Hamburger Helper. The one that is so good there are hardly leftovers. The daily provision of manna and quail reminds me that God wants my daily commitment to Him.

"Morning by morning" 

His intention was not to hype me up over the course of a couple of days (read also: camp high), but to daily walk with me that I may know Him more fully. 

Why is it that I can find time to get away for an entire weekend on occasion, but struggle to find twenty minutes daily? The answer is my flesh.

The sin within me is rebellious towards God. The Good News is that the Spirit is stronger. So I read God's word and I seek to follow His commands as the Spirit within me fights against my flesh. Instead of stuffing myself and hoping it lasts a while, I will seek to get just what I need for that day and then return the next day for what I need then. And don't get me wrong, sometimes what I need is an hour alone with Jesus and my journal. But, I shouldn't expect for my portion necessary for today, to last me beyond that. 

In Lamentations, the author laments over the fall of Jerusalem and the illustrations used in chapter 3 are strong. Things like an animal waiting to attack, followed by an arrow piercing the kidney. It continues with someone being the laughingstock of all peoples and teeth grinding on gravel. Not pleasurable things. And through these things, the author says he has forgotten what happiness is and lost hope in the Lord.

But then...
The author remembers the goodness of the Lord and His steadfast love. He writes,

"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. The Lord is my portion, says my soul, therefore I will hope in him." Lamentations 3:22-24

God knows the sin that runs so rampant in the world and knows what we need, far better than we do. He wants to be our portion and our hope. He is the best portion and the only hope.

So let us stop settling for leftovers and get our daily bread, daily. Just as our stomach's are satisfied after a good meal, so will our hearts be satisfied when we daily submit, and follow God as He has called us.

Praying you get your fill today on something new and fresh. 
Today, I'm eating something other than leftovers and hope you will too!

And as always, never stop growing.

Advent is here. The arrival of Jesus' birth. We wait in expectation of what is to come. Jesus has already been born and died and then raised again, but He's coming back. The days between Thanksgiving and Christmas seem to come quick and go by fast. For many they are filled with booked calendars and endless to do's. I don't think that's the kind of life Jesus was talking about when He mentioned giving us life to the full as counter to the enemy's plan in John 10:10.
​

​If you are looking for an Advent devotional, I would highly recommend "Our Gift-giving God" by my good friend Andrea Kim (available on Amazon here). It is sure to remind you of God's great gifts and call you to greater things as you receive them again and again.

Hope your Christmas is wonderful and as always, never stop growing.

Regan