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**ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED SEPTEMBER 2016**
Bank products, bonds, stocks, retirement fund, investment funds, annuities, commodity futures etc... There are many types of investment options out there when looking to make a buck. So many, that most people hire someone to tell them how they should invest their money. Why is this so important? When I searched "investment" in google this result came up: "In an economic sense, an investment is the purchase of goods that are not consumed today but are used in the future to create wealth. In finance, an investment is a monetary asset purchased with the idea that the asset will provide income in the future or will be sold at a higher price for a profit." I think this clearly answers the question of why we pay other people to tell us how to spend our money. The goal of an investment is "that the asset will provide income in the future or will be sold at a higher price for a profit." When making an investment there is always a risk for a loss. You are probably familiar with the saying, "The greater the risk, the greater the reward." In the same way, the greater the risk, the greater the potential for loss. As educators we are always making investments. The question I want to pose is, what kind of investment are you making? This is my 7th year teaching and my first year (since my first year teaching) that I am not coaching any sport. I thought that I would have so much more free time, but it hasn't seemed to work out that way. First I was very frustrated by this. Then, I started to think about why this is the case. Here is what I found.
What I didn't mention is that I am still tired. I still feel discouraged at times. I still have moments when I fly by the seat of my pants and fail miserably. When my focus is on the negative, I start to question the investment I'm making. Is it really worth it? Am I investing wisely? Is the risk too big? Yes. Maybe. No. Yes, the investment is really worth it. I may be investing wisely. It is something I can continue to evaluate. No, the risk is not too big. We make investments in student lives. The potential return on investment is ALWAYS worth the potential loss.
I haven't often been able to see my return on investment. This summer though, I received an email that I will treasure forever. This email is from a student who was in my class my first year of teaching. He was a difficult student in class. He often showed up late, walked out of class and was off task too many times to count. I invested many hours in this student. I even created a behavior tracking sheet just for him. At the end of the year not much had changed. He emailed me this summer and I received it when I returned to work in August. I replied immediately and received this response: "I am so happy you answered, for some reason I thought you weren't going to. You still have a behavior system with me on it? Lord I don't know if that's good or bad, we both know I was a horrible student. I see you actually enjoy your career, I want to thank you for not giving up on kids like me. It is because of teachers like you that some people decide to change the course they're on. I know it was the reason why I did, and I thank you for that. I went to Sharpstown high school for all 4 years and graduated top 15% of my class with a 3.65 GPA. Became commander for my JROTC unit for 2 years and brought home three 3rd place trophies and a 1st place for my district. After high school I enlisted in the U.S. Army." You see, the investment is always worth it. In an educational sense, an investment is giving up something you value for the sake of another's success. An investment is made with the hope that the person you are investing in does not leave your class in just the same way they entered. I challenge you to consider what kind of investments you are making at work. I also would like to encourage you to continue to make those investments. You may be the only person that believes in "that" student. Keep believing. Keep investing.
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**POST ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN OCTOBER 2016**
It is finally feeling a little more like fall in Texas. Our first grading period ended Friday and Thanksgiving isn't too far away. While looking to the holiday's is always fun, it's important that we as educators stay in the moment while we have students in our classrooms. This of course, is not always easy. We are overwhelmed with meetings and deadlines and parent conferences all while trying to meet the various needs of our students. It's not for the faint of heart. But you my friend, are not the faint of heart. You are an educator. You make a difference. You have a direct impact on the future. You are a superhero. Believe that today. I wanted to provide some tools I use in order to have productive tutorial sessions. I have never particularly loved tutorials. It's more work for me and takes away from time that I could be planning or preparing for the next day or week. Despite my feelings, I have always offered tutorials. When I was also coaching tutorials were especially difficult. I couldn't have them very often and when I did have them they were very short. This year, I have found some ways to take some of the stress off me and put more responsibility on the student. First of all, I use google forms as a way to keep track of who is coming to tutorials. It is a simple sign in sheet that includes their name, class period and the reason they are in tutorials. I then have record of who has come tutorials and how often they have come. This is very helpful when I am contacting parents. The last question is an important piece because it helps the student identify why they are there. "Ms. Ray told me to come" is not an option they have so even if that is why they are there they must reflect on why I "invited" them to come. Secondly, I try to create an environment that provides for more freedom than the regular classroom setting. I usually have music playing and students are allowed to listen to their own music. As my data says, 40% of the students that have come to my tutorials this year have come to either correct or make-up a test that they failed. When they come I am able to provide them with a copy of the test with all of MY work shown. This is an easy way for me to clone myself. With my work already shown, the questions they have become more specific and take less time to answer. This allows me to give special attention to all students and not just one particular student who did very poorly. Once the students correct the test, they then come another time to take the make-up test. Just behind making up a test are the students that are there for basic practice (36%). For this I often use Khan Academy. I sometimes have the students do the problems from the videos and other times I provide the students with some practice problems and allow them to use the videos as a resource. I have also used Kahoot for students who are motivated by competition. Though they are competing, they are also often helping each other in the process. This frees me up to help someone else. I am very lucky to have 12 iPad's in my classroom at all times. It is because of these iPads that I am able to use all of the tools I have mentioned here. I would encourage you, if you are lacking resources (and the students don't have their own devices), to try to find a grant or use Donor's Choose to obtain these resources. Think about your students with me for a moment. Imagine, you have a student sitting in your classroom with no pencil. They have now been in class for 15 minutes and have yet to ask for a pencil. You notice this and ask them if they need a pencil. They say yes. You then go find a pencil for them to use all the while getting onto them about not asking sooner. They now have what they need to be successful but missed the first 15 minutes of class. (speaking from experience here) Moral of the story, don't miss out. Ask. If someone tells you no, go ask someone else. Don't sit there without a pencil. 2022 UPDATE: I now work in a school where each student has a Macbook and almost all of them have a phone. I still use google forms for my students to sign in so that I can keep track of who is coming in. This also helps when having conversations with parents. I do not do make up tests at my current school so most students are coming in to get help with practice or to prepare for a test. I love to use the whiteboards and I also love to have the students explain the problem to me or to someone else in the room. This helps me see where they are getting confused or what they are missing. We also have been known to make a TikTok in tutorials or take some ridiculous .5 selfies. Gotta keep 'em smiling!!!  Many times in the Bible God calls us to remember. We all have different ways of doing that and some do it better than others. We remember through pictures, social media posts, journaling, and sometimes tattoos. One way I remember is by marking milestones or significant events in my calendar to repeat each year. We do this with birthdays, but why not with other God moments? Today I remember my first panic attack (of which I did not know was a panic attack at the time….I lost it over some Mexican food 🤷🏽♀️). But it’s not so much that I remember and celebrate the panic attack that day, but instead the goodness of God in that moment and from then on. Since then I have been on a journey of healing and living. I purposefully say living because while at times the journey has been very difficult, I’m still here and God still has great purpose for me. I think I am FINALLY learning that there is not a quick fix for ANYTHING in life. The hurt can’t be stuffed, it will resurface. The weight might fall, but it will come back. The clamp will plug the leak temporarily, but eventually the pipe will need to be replaced. And don’t we find that when the hurt resurfaces, the weight comes back, or the clamp gives way, it comes back stronger?? Our fast paced society wants us to move along! Make it happen and do it quickly please! But I know that’s not how God created us. He commands us to rest but do we even know what that looks like?? When I think back on that first panic attack in 2015, I can promise you I expected to be fixed in time for school to start in August. And I think in some ways I thought I was. I couldn’t have imagined having more panic attacks years later (thanks COVID) or still feeling like I’m on a roller coaster that doesn’t seem to have an end. But God knew, and God cares, and God was present. He was present in counseling and while I am on medicine and among my support system. I think about the miles Jesus walked during his ministry. Do we know how many that might have been??? It had to be a LOT. Anyway, Jesus was always about the journey, never the destination. He was present in the going and with His help I am trying to learn that as well. Mark 5:21-43 In this passage of scripture, a man approaches Jesus and begs him to come and heal his daughter who is very sick. So Jesus went. But along the way, there was another woman who needed healing, and knowing the power of Jesus, found a way to touch his cloak in hopes of being healed. When the woman grabbed Jesus’ cloak (Mark 5:28), he didn’t swat her away as if he was bothered. He cared for her. The family of the girl who they told Jesus about was now distraught because Jesus was late and as a result the girl had died. Except Jesus wasn’t late, He just wasn’t there yet. His investment in the journey did not mean He missed it. It just meant it wasn’t the way the people expected it to be. When you read this passage you see so many more lives impacted beyond the one girl who was sick. This is because Jesus is about the journey. When things seem to be tugging on me, I’m learning to recognize them and address them, even if it means I’m a little late to where I was headed. I’m learning that it isn’t always about where I am headed but instead about how I might get there. It has taken Jesus + Counseling + Medication + Solid support system + Spiritual rest + Numerous books + Exercise to get me where I am today. Still on a journey, living the fullest life. I literally had a panic attack a month ago, but it doesn’t define me and it doesn’t mean I failed (though that was the lie the enemy wanted me to believe). It means I’m human and I’m broken and I can’t do this alone. I am so thankful that Jesus would be willing to stop on his journey and heal me. He is willing to do the same for you, you need only believe. God is so good. He is so faithful. His grace abounds. Because of this, we never stop growing.  It’s the last few weeks of school and summer is just around the corner. Which means one thing.... Kids. Are. Done! As teachers we have to find ways to deal with this. Mixing it up from your normal routine is an easy way to keep kids engaged and you from going crazy. That is important too!!! I have 2 “games” I want to share with you. The first is Coordinate Plane Battleship Surprisingly, many students have never played old school Battleship! So if they have never played the original, this will take a little extra explanation. You can also show them this video. I provide the template below for my students, to save on time. There are 2 boards per page. You can also download the PDF version of this here.  Rules:
-your boats can be horizontal, vertical, or diagonal -your boats can’t intersect (that means they have crashed which is bad) -you can’t plot any part of your boat on the outside border (no value should be 5 or -5) -when your opponent sinks your ship, you must tell them what ship they sank You might notice that there are only 4 boats. In normal battleship there is also a submarine (3 spaces) but I have left that one off in this version. It helps the game extend a little longer. When you are explaining the game be sure to give students tips on how to track what they have guessed in addition to marking when their opponent has hit a part of their ship. It is IMPERATIVE that students track their own guesses as hits or misses in case there is a discrepancy. The point of this game is for students to be proficient in plotting points on the coordinate plane. While students are playing, I walk around and make sure students are correctly plotting the points they are saying as well as helping students who aren’t sure if they have the right point. The second game is Integer Battles The beauty of this game is all you need is playing cards, preferably between 18-22 cards per pair of students. This game has multiple versions... Version A - addition Version B - multiplication Version C - subtraction Version D - which is smaller Students pair up (either on their own or your choice) and receive either 18 or 22 cards. Players will deal the deck so that each player has the same number of cards. You want to make sure each student gets an odd number of cards so that a clear winner can be determined. Players start with their cards in a pile face down. Players flip their top card at the same time and then, depending on the version, do the math. Black cards (spades and clubs) are positive numbers, red cards (hearts and diamonds) are negative numbers. All face cards (King, Queen, Jack) are 10 and Aces are 1. For higher difficulty you could change the Jack to 11, Queen to 12, and King to 13. The first person to answer correctly wins that round. Play continues until all cards have been played. When a player wins a round, those cards are set aside and NOT returned to their deck. At the end of play one player will have more cards and is the winner. If players say the correct answer at exactly the same time they can rock, paper, scissors for the win or shuffle those cards back into the remaining deck. For addition and multiplication, as we know, order doesn’t matter. (Something to discuss with students before) For subtraction, make sure students are sitting right next to each other and not across from each other so that they are both reading the problem from left to right. You could also have students write a (-) on a piece of paper, or with dry erase marker on their desk, to help them. The last version would be good for lower grades. Also, you could use only black cards if you haven’t worked with negative numbers yet. I have done this tournament style as well as just telling students they must play “x” number of different players. If you would like to play tournament style, this link is helpful in creating a bracket. These games are great fillers and a great way to mix it up at the end of the year but don’t be afraid to bring them out early!! I teach freshmen and sophomores and I promise, even they love it. Anytime a kid loves what they are doing in math class is a win for me! Do you have any other games we should know about???? Share in the comments!! Finish strong and never stop growing!! Well, life has been pretty quiet since the last time I wrote here (Jan 2020). HA! We all know that is the farthest thing from the truth. Most of us are ready for 2020 to see it's way out. Let's be careful not to put our hope in 2021, a vaccine, or some other worldly means to end our trouble. Let's put our hope in Jesus. We can be confident in that hope. These other things, if you haven't learned yet, are pretty worthless things to put your hope in. They lead to disappointment, distress, and discouragement. Many teachers in Texas return to full time work tomorrow. As I think about what this means for me, I considered writing solely about this new journey. But then I realized I wouldn't be giving you the real story. I could very easily write about how this year is going to be hard, but it is going to be good and we can do it. And while I believe that to be true, if I only bring you upbeat and positive words, I am not being truthful about this "growing in all things" journey I am on. When we first started teaching online in the spring, I was loving it! The commute, the attire, the snacks! What a dream! Besides home internet woes, life was good. I was cautious, but not overly fearful. The highlight of my week was usually a trip to Kroger. And then quarantine took on the persona of the energizer bunny and just kept going, and going, and going... I tried to stay upbeat and positive but the media and online fatigue was starting to wear on me. Online school bled into summer but I still struggled to find rest for my weariness. I kept telling myself "unprecedented times" to help me cope. And while that helped me in moments, it wasn't addressing my deeper emotional needs and struggles. My biggest fear was having COVID19 and then getting others sick (not too concerned with my own health). All I knew to do was just keep going. And then one day I woke up with a really bad headache. I was sure it was allergies but that fear of the virus just swirled in my head. For about 4 days I took allergy medicine and tried to ward it off. I remember having low energy also. I needed to get better because I was headed to Alabama for a week at the beach in a few days! I did start feeling a little better but just as my physical body started to improve, my mental state declined. On the morning of my planned road trip with friends to Alabama, I had what I now understand to be a mild panic attack. I couldn't do it. I stayed home while my friends went on. I knew I made the right decision but it was still hard to sit with all week. So my emotional health just continued to decline. I didn't have energy to do anything. I moved from my couch to my bed throughout the day scrolling my phone or bingeing Netflix. The fear that I had COVID19 and might have transmitted it was rising. Test appointments were booking 3 days out and spots were filling up fast. I never got tested. I had another panic attack. This one much worse. I have an incredible tribe of both family and friends and by the grace of God I was able to reach out to them and so many were there to support me in that time. Unfortunately, after recovering from the panic attack, things didn't get better. I ended up in the emergency room the next day with stomach pain that I had been enduring since the attack. While I was fearful of many things, at this point I knew I needed respite from the anxiety that had overtaken me. I tried so many things and it just wouldn't give. The next week was really hard. I needed a lot of support and am so thankful (again) for my tribe, because they were there. With the help of my tribe, counseling, medicine, and Jesus, I am in a much better place as I am about to begin another school year, like none before. I have not arrived, and I am good with that now. I am on a journey. You are on a journey. There are hills, and valleys, and flat roads on this journey. The best thing I have learned recently is to continually reflect on where I am in the journey and how that is making me feel. Too often, I am racing up the hills, flying down the valleys, and cruising the flat roads. Now more than ever, I just want to be present. I want to recognize every step I take, both the painful and the joyous. Not sure if you've every climbed a mountain or even a steep hill, but turns out racing up to the top might be exhilarating in the moment only to leave you exhausted at the top. And if you've ever rolled down a hill or skied down a mountain too quickly, you know how poorly that can end. So today, perhaps you need to just be present in the moment. In the step of today. When you feel yourself moving too quickly, stop, take a break and remember to savor each step. If this is hard for you (as it is for me), the best advice I can give you is to talk to someone. Find a counselor. Seek out a precious member of your tribe. Don't miss an opportunity to be a more healthy you. You are worth it. You can do hard things, but remember to savor even the hard things so that you don't miss an opportunity to grow. Be kind to yourself. Give grace to others. Never stop growing. Much love, Regan P.S. I gave blood a few weeks ago and my antibody test came back positive. Perhaps it wasn't allergies... P.P.S. By the grace of God I was able to travel to Boise in July to see good friends and escape the Texas heat. Even in valleys there can be reasons to celebrate. 
If you have any sort of social media, or even access to the internet, I would guess that you have heard about the Netflix docuseries "Cheer". It follows the Navarro Junior College cheer team as they go for their 14th National title. Don't worry, no spoilers here. I watched the entire series (6 episodes) in about 3 days. It was so good. I do recommend it, but maybe for different reasons than most are talking about.
If you have seen any comments about the show you most likely have heard about Monica, Jerry, LaDarius, Morgan, and Lexi. Just today I watched the clip of Monica, Jerry, LaDarius, and Gabi on the Ellen Show. Ellen talks to them about their stories and how incredible they are. Every person has a story. Every person deserves for someone to listen to their story. Every kid deserves a champion. Many of the kids on Monica's team came from some really tough backgrounds. Not accepted by their family, left to be on their own at a young age, losing a parent. Life is hard. These stories are why I think so many people were enthralled with this show. People wanted to see that they could do it. That they could overcome these seemingly unsurmountable odds and make something of themselves. Possible spoiler: They did. And people all over the country are shouting their praise for these kids, claiming they would do anything for them, just as Monica did. The investment our country has in the Navarro cheer team is astounding. And to me, slightly troubling. For every member of the Navarro cheer team that you rooted for, there are thousands just like them in your local school system. I don't care what kind of students you think attend your local schools, each one of them deserves a champion, and very few get the champion they deserve. It is very easy to lay in bed and cheer on someone on a screen who does have someone fighting for them. But if you were so compelled by this show, are you willing to do something about it? I am in my tenth year of teaching and every year I seek to love my kids as my own. I have taught public and private school. I have taught kids with very troubling childhoods in both settings. Growing up is not getting any easier. I used to think that the students with dedicated parents and a stable home didn't need me. That's just not true anymore. I have counseled so many kids who come from very stable and supportive families. Growing up is hard and they need us. So I have a challenge for you. Reach out to your local school system or neighborhood ministry and ask how you can help. Find out if they have mentor programs. I can tell you that schools have a lot on their hands, so if they say no, try again or be the one to make it happen. What if you were the champion for a Jerry, or LaDarius, or Morgan in your own city? There will most likely not be a documentary made about it, but I can promise you, it will be one of the greatest things you ever did. And if you do it, or have done it, and not seen results like you saw in Cheer, please don't give up. That's another reality that is hard to face. Kids who face extreme hardship don't always make it out. But with everyone stepping in I do believe a difference can be made and more kids will find hope to persevere. Who were the champions in your life? Do you need to thank them today? How can you be a champion for someone else? Here's to growing in new ways in 2020! Much love and thanks for reading. The professionals. They make it look easy. We see them make one mistake and immediately question their ability.
I have been watching a lot of tennis over the last couple of weeks. If you missed the mens final, you really missed out. What a match. I grew up playing tennis and love the sport. I love playing with my mom and even joined a rec league this past spring which was a great challenge for me. As I watch all of the greats, and even the "new kids on the block" play, I find myself sighing in disbelief when they miss a shot. And then I just laugh to myself remembering how much I struggle to make a shot after a measly 5 shot rally. What these people are doing is hard. There are some people that we think are “professional Christians”. They make faith, obedience, and pursuing holiness look easy. The truth is a, professional does not become one overnight. All you see is the performance. No one will pay to watch hours and hours of someone practicing their skill, seeking counsel from coaches or eating the perfect amount of macros each day. (However I do follow JJ Watt on instagram and I don’t mind getting a peek into his life) So think back to that “professional Christian” you know and consider this: How many hours have they spent reading and memorizing scripture? How many hours have they spent with a trusted mentor to learn what it looks like to walk by the Spirit? How many times have they surrendered their struggle to God in faith? As observers we may think we can do it just like the professionals do. But, I’ve played tennis, and it ain’t as easy as they make it seem. So when the waters rise, when challenges come, and you’re hoping you will/can perform like a "professional" Christian, you might be disappointed. **disclaimer: the only "professional" Christian is the one with Jesus** There is good news though: You can start training TODAY!!! Do the work. Though there is no such thing as a professional Christian, there is such thing as a seasoned person of faith. Show up, day after day, and expect for God to show up. It is NOT: Show up, day after day, and watch how good you get. Young people everywhere are training to be the next JJ Watt, Serena Williams, Justin Verlander, or whoever else you think is a great athlete. The truth is, most of them won't get there. I am always encouraged by students who show up to the weight room over and over again to improve in their sport. I am even more impressed by those that show up but still don't get to play as much as they would like. But when we seek spiritual strength, we realize we can never lose. Romans 5: 1 - 5 Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. Yes, and Amen!! Jeremiah 29:13 "You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart." Be all in. I know from personal experience that going to the gym for 3 weeks, stopping for 6 weeks, and going back for another 2 does not give me the results I am looking for. I have to be all in. Fully committed to the cause. What can you do today to go all in? Pray. Surrender. Ask for help. Seek accountability. Read His word. I can't answer that for you. But I can tell you that surrender = freedom. I can also tell you that it has taken significant work on my part to have the faith I have today. I believe in God more today because of the experiences (read also trials, sufferings, not fun things...) I've had, working together with spiritual disciplines in my life. And of course, as the name of my blog suggests, it's never over. Not until we reach "professional" status and God calls us home. Stay in it friend. Go for it. I believe in you. Here for you as you seek to never stop growing. Well, June came and went. July is just behind us and here we are already 4 days into August. In the next couple of weeks teachers in Texas will be returning to work. I personally return tomorrow, a week before everyone else at my campus because of a two-week course I am teaching. As I prepare to return I can't help but reflect on this summer as well as what "summer" is to every other teacher.
For those of you that aren't teachers I thought I might give you a little insight into our lives and perhaps help you know how to love on your teacher friends, spouses, or family members in the next few weeks. The Stages of Summer Stage 1: Weeks 1 - 3 During Stage 1 you will most likely find a teacher sleeping in without an alarm. I would love to say this meant we were sleeping until 10, but most likely not. This is also the stage where we just don't do a whole lot. There probably is a lot of binge watching Netflix, catching up on the DVR, or finally watching the movie that everyone has been talking about. I can guarantee that most teachers think nothing of their job in these first few weeks. For me personally, this stage usually includes a nice long interrupted breakfast, and a nap daily. This is the time where we get to decompress and try to forget about why we wanted to quit our job in April. Stage 2: Weeks 4 - 6 Stage 2 is what I would call the fun stage. You could find a teacher doing a number of different things. Whatever it is that is "fun" to them. For some it means a trip to a new destination. For others it is lunch dates with the various people they never get to see. Stage 2 might also be filled with family time, particularly for those who don't have family close. After we have rested in Stage 1 (and yes, it can take that long), we are now ready to go out and do the things we have been dreaming about. Stage 3: Weeks 7 - 8 Stage 3 is all business. This is the time when we cram every doctor appointment, hair appointment, car service, and home improvement project necessary. It's not fun, but for me (Enneagram 1) it actually can bring me a lot of joy. It is during this stage that we can start to feel purposeless, so having a to do list and knocking it out may be just what we need. This is the stage where others start to make comments about us still being on vacation. I always try to respond with grace but sometimes it is hard. Stage 4: Weeks 9 - 10 Stage 4 is the start of the return. If we haven't already run into the school supply section at Wal-Mart and Target we are definitely seeing it now. There may be a little denial at first but then the panic starts to set in. So much to get done before we have to return to work. We know we won't actually get a significant amount of time to work in our rooms during in-service so for some, this stage means getting into our classrooms to prepare for in-service! We make lists of supplies we will need and have long internal conversations about what we really "need" and what we just "want". We try to rationalize purchases for things that we know we can find in the supply room. We also get excited about a new year and the joys of teaching. Stage 1 was a long time ago, so the woes of the previous year have long been forgotten. We will start another year, most of us with a new group of students, with a new hope. Similar to the stages of summer, there are stages of the school year for which we mentally prepare ourselves. A new school year can cause anxiety for many with all the unknowns. This is true even for a teacher at the same school, in the same position. We created for ourselves a new normal during summer and here we are returning to the same job, but wondering what could be, or maybe forgetting how it is. The first week back can be so fun as we reminisce about our summers with coworkers but it always goes way too quickly. Soon enough we will be staying late at school, having parent meetings, and planning interventions for students. But not yet. This is something I have to remind myself often. My calendar is planned months in advance and I am always looking to what's next. I find more joy when I enjoy the present instead of worrying about the future. So how to love a teacher this week:
There is no doubt I love what I do. It does not negate the fact that it is hard. There is a lot of responsibility for teachers and most of us don't take that lightly. All the teachers I know would sacrifice a lot for their students without asking for anything in return. We needed this summer, and we are thankful for it. But summer is over and it's time to get back to work. Teacher friends... we got this!! Really, God's got this and I'm just here to show up. And when just showing up is hard, God will give me the strength, hopefully with the help of my community encouraging me all the while. Cheers to summer, a fresh start, and a desire to never stop growing! **Teacher friends I would love to hear your comments on the Stages of Summer. What did I miss? Did anything ring true for you? Let me know in the comments!**  Have you ever seen the “footprints” poster like the one here? I’m pretty sure I had one in my room. In fact, I remember it well. There is a poem with it that talks about two sets of footprints, representing yours and God's. Then the person notices only one set of footprints and finds out that is because God was carrying them. Sweet. Really. But is this real? What strikes me funny today about this poster is the picture behind it. The picture with these large caving footprints in the sand that anyone within eyesight can see. While this poster is cute and inspirational, I look into my life, then and now, and think, that's just not how it goes! I visit Galveston often and enjoy walking on the beach in the mornings. A few weeks ago, while on a walk, this poster from my childhood came to mind. I usually walk close to the water, sometimes close enough that my feet get caught up in the water, other times just where the tide stops. And as I walk, I can barely make out my own footprints. I tried! **This was my best attempt**  I stepped a little harder, and a little longer, and still, all I could see was a faint outline of where I had just stepped. I ventured away from the tide in an attempt to find sand that would revel in the impact of my step. Still nothing. But yet, I was still walking. Did the fact that my steps weren't visible in the moments after negate the fact that I had actually taken a step? Not at all!! When we walk with purpose, our steps matter. We, as Christians, find our purpose from the Spirit. My flesh says, "I want to see the impact!", but the Spirit says, "Walk by faith, not by sight." (2 Corinthians 5:7) Scripture is clear that we can not gratify the desires of the flesh and the desires of the Spirit simultaneously. "For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do." Galatians 5:17 "For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God's law; indeed, it cannot. Those who are in the flesh cannot please God." Romans 8:5-8 We must choose. Flesh or Spirit? Seen or Unseen? Temporary or Eternal? As it talks about in Romans, we must decide how we will "set our minds". "For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace." Now consider how many thoughts you have in a day. How many times your mind wanders off into dangerous territory or carelessness. Setting our minds is not a one and done deal. It is an all the time thing. It is a discipline we must practice.
The result is beautiful. As we set our minds on the Spirit, we walk with greater purpose, confidence, and joy, regardless of our circumstances. We no longer search for our footprint in the sand, and instead choose to keep walking. I find myself constantly looking for my footprints. The big, bold footprint for all to see. And I firmly believe it is God's grace that has kept me from seeing them. Perhaps His constant reminder that this is not my home. His grace acting as a tender nudge that I am to walk by faith and not by sight. So I pray for more faith. And then, I keep walking. Friend, His grace is sufficient for you. (2 Corinthians 12:9) No matter where I walk on the beach, eventually the water will rise and wash away any evidence of my steps. My hope is this; as I walk in the Spirit, nothing can wash away the steps I make toward Jesus. The world is constantly telling us to "show out". Make a statement. Be great. The Spirit only asks that we "show up". Rest in that today. Keep walking and keep growing.
At 24 and as a first time homebuyer I can guarantee you there were things that happened that I didn't understand or even know to ask about in the process of buying. I am very lucky to have all of my family in Houston and my dad was definitely the most frequent contact I had through that process. My mom is my resident interior decorator and showed up at my condo on multiple occasions, without me there, to do what needed to be done. It was a team effort and I'm so thankful I have this team beside me. While on the subject of my team I want to share one of my favorite pictures of us. This was on New Year's Day in 2015. My parents had just recently sold the house I grew up in, in Katy, and were still not finished remodeling their new home in Houston, so I was able to host and am so glad I did. We watched football, ate some good food, and as you can see, had the best time.  Now back to the original story: I remember being so excited about it all, while also very overwhelmed. It wasn’t long after living there that I was dealing with homeowner problems. Like serious problems. Problems that involved my insurance company representing me in a lawsuit. But God was faithful through it all.
I laughed, cried, and found rest in that place for 6 1/2 years. I lived alone at times but also shared that place with 4 different people, and countless other guests. It was the people that lived with me or came to visit who made it feel like home. I was unsure if such a small place in such a confined area could feel like a home. But it did, and God knew it would. As I mentioned earlier, none of this went as I would have planned myself. Though I’ve never really had a timeline on when I thought I would be married, I surely didn’t think it would take this long. And as I made a home in my condo, I kept hoping for a day to come when I would find someone and we would be able to get a house together. Days turned to months, and months turned to years that I was still at the condo dreaming of more. But God wanted me there. So I remained. As I remained, I continually made minor improvements or small upgrades as if I would be there forever, knowing that wasn't my dream. This is what would help me be grateful and content where I was. I will never forget the day I went to Bed Bath and Beyond to buy new towels. I realized I may have been waiting for an opportunity to put some on a registry instead of going to get some myself. There may be someone reading this that just needs to hear that: You are worth buying some new towels! As I remained, I was blessed. Blessed by different roommates as I mentioned. Blessed by family who would always show up when I needed help. Blessed by the people that would say yes to an invitation for dinner. Blessed by not having to move in 6 1/2 years. And even blessed for the reasons I still don't even know. A year ago I really wanted to get out of the condo and into a bigger space. That was it, I just wanted more room and space to breathe. After praying and finally presenting the idea to God, I clearly heard Him say NO. I hated that answer, but I love God. So through the grace of God (and only by His grace), I obeyed. I pursued the idea again this spring with slightly different reasons and motives, and felt God saying yes along the way. My condo sold in 2 days. Did I mention God is good? The last month has been a whirlwind as I have closed on my condo and put a contract on a new house. Every day I thank God for His faithfulness and am encouraged even more to continue to obey. My dreams are good, but His plan is best. So here I am, having sold my first home and getting ready to buy my second home at only 31, and still single. And God is good. The house with the yard that I’ve been dreaming about is about to become a reality. God has been so faithful, but only through fellowship with Him am I able to see His goodness. Because, if I rely on my own flesh and desires, I am constantly disappointed. Nothing seems as it should. Is it possible that you are looking at your circumstances through the wrong lens? Isaiah 55:8-9 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Just because we don’t understand, doesn’t mean He isn't good. Consider today how you might be able to say thanks, even while you don't understand. As I left that place this week for the last time, I felt so thankful. God’s goodness is so far beyond what we can understand. I am moving to the "burbs" (Jersey Village) and am so excited about what’s coming next. My prayer through all of this has been Proverbs 16:9 “The heart of man plans his way but the Lord establishes his steps.” Lord, continue to establish my steps even as I make my own plans. May I never step to the right or the left before you have directed me to do so. Your ways are better Lord and I ask you to give me the grace to choose that always, over my own desire. Amen. Thanks for reading and remember, never stop growing. |
Regan RayI have a lot of thoughts so I decided to put them all here. Archives
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